The thing that annoys me

A doctor told me I was chronically depressed. At first, I thought, "Well, that makes sense." Looking back over my life even since a senior in highschool I have had "symptoms" of being depressed. When I started taking medicine for my depression I noticed that I did, in fact, make me feel better. I was able to get out of bed in the morning, do my chores, and greet Jason with a smile which was not my norm for the last couple years. However, over time I can't help but think my "depression" was more of a situational anxiety of sorts. Jason comes home from work and often talks of just wanting to go to bed. He complains about not wanting to go to work the next day and while it seemed his attitude paralleled that of my depressed mood, he is not seen as depressed. I sometimes can't help but think I've been misdiagnosed because I've been going to the wrong physician. The Anderson's (as it were) don't believe in depression and this is why: We are Christians. We have the Lord on our side. Should He not always be able to intervene when we are feeling down? I certainly do not read my Bible or pray near as often as I should and I'm only recently getting back into church. Does the medicine still help? There are those who would say, yes. Without it, by the end of the day, I can be a real monster. But, isn't it normal to feel tired at the end of the day and isn't it my Christian duty to not be perceived as a monster when I am feeling grumpy?

Jason wants me to continue taking the medicine because he thinks it keeps me from being grumpy. And, hey, if I'm constantly "fake" happy while on the medicine I guess I might as well take it for my family's sake. But I certainly do not think I should lose sight of the fact that I need God in my life a LOT more often than I've been letting Him in. I'm quite certain if I can get back on track spiritually, I will no longer be depressed.

Therefore, as of Christmas Eve 2011 I think I'm going back to the Anderson way and no longer believing in Depression. Is it a worldly diagnosis that many non-Christians deal with on a daily basis? Yes. Is is something Christians deal with from time to time? Yes, I think so. King David and others in the Bible seems to feel down. But who did they turn to? God. And did it take them long to come through it? I don't really know. But I do know by the end of Psalms, there's only praising God to be heard. I also know King David didn't have depression medicine. He relied on God to get him through and that's what I need to do if I ever want to feel that blissful happiness that has been a long time gone from me.